Being Okay With Failure

A perspective shift

I listen to a lot of podcasts. They vary on many different topics that I find interesting. One day I will write a post on all my favorite podcasts I listen to and think you should as well. Today, I am going to share about one in particular and something one of the hosts said that has resonated with me for the last several days.

Last week while driving to a meeting I listened to “The Champion Forward Podcast” hosted by John Harrison and Ben Zobrist. I like that this podcast focuses on athletic performance and emotional health. It was at the end of the episode that the hosts were summarizing their talk with former professional baseball player, Mario Garza that I heard something Ben Zobrist said that has been on my mind.

Ben said, “If you are not failing, you are not putting yourself in a situation that is challenging.”

I kept thinking about challenges I’ve faced over the years. Have I been willing to put myself in a challenging situation that I might fail at but would also learn a lot from?

There have been times in my life that I absolutely did not want to fail. I wanted to succeed to the point that I would make sure that failure wasn’t an option. I did put myself in a challenging situation when I decided to go back to school and finish my degree online while working a full time job. (I didn’t fail and I succeeded far more than I ever thought possible!)

Unfortunately, for too many years I looked at failure as a bad thing. I grew up thinking that if I failed, I didn’t try hard enough or I wasn’t good enough. I also have a strong desire of not wanting to let others down. So, that meant if I failed, I was letting those around me down. Throw in some perfectionism and it became the perfect storm to send me down a road that was less challenging. A less challenging road meant less opportunity to disappointment myself and others. It also meant there would be little growth in my life. I hate to admit there were times I just didn’t try because I didn’t want to fail.

However, I believe reframing failure as a positive and not a negative, like what Ben and John were discussing, then it won’t seem so scary and disheartening. Taking away the fear that comes with failure and replacing it with some grace and patience can go a long way in reframing failure as a negative thing.

There is always room to grow when there is failure. As I have gotten older, there have been many times I intentionally take on a new challenge, even if it means I might fail and not be the best, because I know that there is something for me to learn. When I have failed (sometimes spectacularly!), I have learned that it wasn’t the right thing for me. Other times, it pushed me to be better by reexamining what went wrong and how I could improve.

I think it’s time to start looking at failure as a positive thing in our lives. Take what we think are failures and turn them into moments where we can learn and grow.

What do you think? Are you okay with failure? Do you see failure as a positive or a negative? Leave a comment and let me know your thoughts!